Kermit After YOUR Cat!

I thought this whole hoopla with H1N1 was winding down. I check Google’s flu trends on an almost hourly basis and noticed the number of flu cases trending down. I even gave myself a week off from this blog to reorganize my thoughts and begin investigating the Kermitocracy’s next move against humanity.

Then it happened. A cat in Iowa got swine flu.

I thought to myself, this couldn’t be. It can’t. It just shouldn’t.

But after double and triple-checking I was forced to recognize that the feline beauty I was reading about was the newest target in the Porcine-Anuran’s campaign to bring the human race down.

I guess after realizing that H1N1 was not strong enough to liquidate us all in a matter of months, Kermit decided to attack our closest friends, our pets, in an effort to demoralize us. This just might be Kermit’s most offensive act to date.

But I will not be demoralized. I will remain steely in the face of Anuran adversity. We have Kermit and his disease-ridden concubine against the wall, and now is the time to finish them off for good! Join with me, fellow humans, and let’s show the Kermitocracy what we’re really made of: happy feelings and the urge to bring down anything and everything involved in the Kermitocracy!

Protect your pets, kind people. They are the newest targets of a homicidal frog hellbent to destroy the human race. I recommend going out and getting your furry friends respirators, Tamiflu, and hand sanitizer. It was enough to protect us humans, surely it will be enough to protect our beloved animals.

Down with Kermitocracy!